Insert title here. Or don’t. I won’t tell.

Yo blawg.  Whazzup.  I have been neglecting you.  As a result, my brain has begun to atrophy.  I can feel it shriveling up like a little raisin.  Hopefully said shriveling will soon cease.  (Say that four times fast!  I dare you!)

On Saturday the twins spent a good thirty minutes weightlifting.  They are three.  They have not watched any form of weightlifting before, so must have been using their manly instincts.  (If “manly”= “senseless”)  They took turns hefting an ottoman up in their little arms and tromping around the room with it, complete with the requisite grunting as they staggered under the heavy weight.  Over and over again, because brute force never gets old!  Or maybe they are training to be furniture movers, I suppose their talents could take them in either direction.

Question: What birthday gift do you buy for a child that has every toy ever manufactured in the U.S., China, and Bangladesh?

Answer: Whatever random crap you helplessly grab after searching the toy aisles for twenty-five minutes, the all-important gift receipts attached with tape.  Because I give up.

Yesterday I witnessed a powerful lesson in self-confidence.  The fattest guy I have ever seen, balancing on a little motorcycle.  Wider than he was tall, wearing blue mirrored sunglasses and an expression that said “Yeah, I’m a super fox.  Check me out, ladies.”  The next time I start to fret about the extra couple of pounds surrounding my midsection I will picture Jabba the Hut tooling about on his motorbike. 

I have been overwhelmed with a crushing fatigue the past few days.  I keep hoping it will step off of my bad self.  (Take that, tired!)  But for today, I feel like I sound flat.  Or I sound like I feel flat.  I think I need to go soak my raisin brain.  (Raisin bran!)  (What?)  I’m going to step away from the keyboard before someone gets hurt.

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May 28, 2008. Uncategorized.

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