More Matthew. (Who else?)

Yesterday Matthew was riding his bike with his friend Sean.  I am CONSTANTLY having to remind the older boys to wear their helmets, so I was pleasantly surprised to see he had remembered on his own.  I made a mental note to commend his responsibility, and a little while later he parked his bike and came inside.  I asked him where his glasses were and he remembered he left them at Sean’s house, so he rushed out to get them.

Is anyone sensing some foreshadowing here?

SURE ENOUGH,  a few minutes later our neighbor bursts through the door and shouts “Matthew’s hurt bad!”  I was so concerned that I ignored his poor grammar and hurried out.  There was a dazed Matthew, blood running down his glasses, down his face, down his coat, dripping on his sneakers- blood everywhere.  He “didn’t have time” to put his helmet on, so instead we spent THE ENTIRE EVENING getting sutured and tested for brain trauma. 

Four stitches on his forehead later he was back to his old self, even hatching a scheme to get the tooth fairy to feel sorry for him so that she would leave extra money.  (He lost his tooth at school yesterday.)  The tooth fairy wanted to point out that she had just forked over thirty bucks for a co-pay because he was too stupid to wear his helmet while on the two wheeler he had just learned how to ride without training wheels, but with great effort instead just replied “hmm.”

He also wondered aloud if his head injury would prevent him from doing his math homework, but by the time I finished laughing he had wisely abandoned that idea.

So that was last night!  Since I was watching Matthew get stitched up like a quilt I didn’t have to cook dinner, which was a nice break.  Mike took care of feeding the other kids.  (Microwaved chicken nuggets, pickles, and milk is too a nutritious, well-rounded dinner.  In some countries.  Like, the third world ones.  Maybe.)


You may remember from previous posts that Matthew is TERRIFIED of anything canine, while simultaneously insisting he wants a pet dog.  (He is not concerned with so-called “logic”.)  On the way to school this morning he informed me he “doesn’t want a German Shepard anymore.”  (Probably a good idea for someone scared of puppies the size of hamsters.)  So anyway, now he wants a “mudge”.  “A whatnow? A mutt?”  [insert eyeroll here]  “No, a MUG.”  (Duh, mom.)  “Do you mean a pug?  With the squished up faces?”  “Yes, one of those.  Because they have little tails.”

The doctor assured me there was no concussion, no brain damage.  If it was anyone but Matthew I may be wondering about that, but no- he is definitely his normal Matthew self.


February 13, 2009. Uncategorized. 1 comment.


This is only the second time I have been on a computer since Christmas!  Nothing says “you are awesomely popular” like 748 new email messages!  Only about eight were from actual real people, but I don’t see what that has to do with anything. 

Our computer is broken.  SORT OF.  It is broken for me.  Mike, on the other hand, works with computers for a living, and can get it to function using some advanced technological components, such as the cardboard tube from a roll of toilet paper.  If THAT gets too squished he adds a child’s mitten to the elaborate cable/plug support structure.  Desperation leads to drastic measures, and he needs to have a functioning computer at home.  How else could he repeatedly view amusing Super Bowl commercials, I would like to know?

I have been absent due to any number of factors- general busy nonsense, procrastination, a fondness for sleeping, twins I must referee by being physically planted between for 14 hours a day, blah blah whatever.  I also had a mental ‘issue’ where the longer it had been since I had written, the more I felt a pressure to compose a massive perfect all- inclusive post detailing everything that had happened since the previous one, and so that pressure led to procrastination, which I overcame by realizing I am CRAZY.   Because that is RIDICULOUS.  So as a result of all that CRAZY I am not actually telling you anything right now, but merely confirming my continued existence (and trying to remember how to type.)  I will catch up gradually, with small posts.  Or not.  Who knows?  What I do know is that not writing makes me CRAZY.  (Well, a LOT of things do, like finding abandoned toilet paper tubes all over the house, but I won’t get in to that right now.)

I will be back before March!  I will even be back before we elect an entirely different President!  Which happened the last time I stopped posting  (Goodbuy George W!  We is miss you!  It is a burden having a leader that can complete a coherent sentence.)

February 9, 2009. Uncategorized. 1 comment.